Responsibility

Bet you thought this post was going to go on and on and whine about how my children never pick up after themselves, and never do what they are told, right? Well, you are wrong, though there is one in particular who does that, this post isn't about him, oops, I mean isn't about that particular subject.

This post is regarding Miss 11 and her complete ability to baffle me. Or it could be my inability to understand her, one or the other, and who's responsibility it is to keep her moving forward.

Late last week Miss 16 and Mr 19 were fortunate enough to be at the lake with friends. Miss 16 was staying at a cabin with a friend and her family and Mr 19 was off gallivanting with his friends at a nearby lake. Miss 11 was stuck home with us, as is not unusual since she is only 11. We felt sorry for her, and decided to take her out for ice cream.

We drove to the ice cream place, actually it's a miniature golf place that just happens to serve ice cream, and stepped up to the counter to decide what we wanted. There were two people working, a mother and son I would guess, and they both started talking to us. Heaven forbid! Miss 11 was trying to make her decision when one of them asked, "What can I get you? Waffle cone, plain cone, dish?" She looked at me, clearly panicked to have people speaking to her, with a question in her eyes. I explained her options and she whispered the answer to me, I relayed it to the attendant. The attendant picked up the waffle cone, walked back over and asked what she wanted in it. Again Miss 11 got the panicked look in her eyes, and I just took over, telling the attendant what I wanted, Hubby then told them what he wanted and Miss 11 was still trying to decide. Finally she whispered in Hubby's ear what she had decided and he passed the information on. End of transaction, we got ate our ice cream (mine was licorice chip by the way, mmmmmm!) and walked to the van.

As the evening progressed I thought more and more about how shy Miss 11 can be, and I worried as mother's do about how we sometimes coddle her. I wondered whether I should have forced her to order her own ice cream, or if just making her life easier was ok.

Then yesterday I had one of those "oh my gosh my kids don't need me" moments. Miss 11 has volleyball camp this week. She attends for 1.5 hours every morning. It's in a building she has spent time in often for various other volleyball related activities. I have always had to walk her in to those activities, stay until she was comfortable with her coach, or sometimes stay the entire time, and if I left I always had to be back well before she was done waiting where she could see me.

Yesterday we got to the building, she opened the van door, hopped out and said "see you afterwards!"

"Wait," I said, "don't you want me to walk you in?"

"Nope, I'm good!"

"Um, ok, I'll be waiting in the parking lot when you are done, I'll park by the building, look for me there."

"Ok, bye Mom, love you!"

And off she scampered. I had added the wait for you in the parking lot part just to test her, and she was fine. She didn't care if I was coming in, or walking her in, she was completely fine being dropped off. It was strange, especially after the few days spent worrying about the shyness. She didn't know who was her coach or who was at camp, and none of it bothered her.

So now I wonder, what do I force her to do (order for herself) and what do I just wait for her to be comfortable doing on her own?

Ear Muffs

Last week we went to SuperSister's best friends farm. She raises mini horses and full size horses. We had a great time wandering through the mini pen with the new babies. My girls were in love and both begged to bring one home.

The best part was watching my Niece. Although she has been at the farm several times, and she begs to go, she still has a slight fear of the animals and spends her entire time wandering around with her hands over her ears. For some reason she has chosen this as her scared look, and she does it all the time. You can see her in the bottom left of the photo with Miss 11.

Less Needed

Yesterday was a big day for Miss 16. She was very nervous, but she persevered and passed her driver's license test! So now we have 1 more driver in the house, and because of that I am just a little less needed at home. Sigh. Though I love that I won't need to schedule my time around when both girls need rides, I am really going to miss the times I had in the vehicles with Miss 16. Not always, but many days when I picked her up from school I got a little glimpse into what her days are like, she usually had something to tell me, or something to complain about, and I will miss those few moments we had alone each day. Yes, we'll probably have times at home alone before Miss 11 will need a ride home, but it's not the same. There are too many rooms in the house, too many things that need to be done, and too much temptation to be in separate rooms. I'll miss those trapped in the car with mom moments of one on one time.

Twin Cities Tour

We are home from our vacation in Minneapolis/St. Paul. Although it really didn't feel much like a vacation, we didn't do a lot of touristy things, we didn't sit on a beach and relax, I didn't read any trashy novels. But, we did stay in a hotel, and the girls swam in the pool there, so I guess there is that.

Miss 16 had her Doc appointment with her surgeon, long story short, more monitoring required. So although it was a short to the point appointment, this way we have a direction to take.

Mr 19 went along and stayed at my Hubby's sister's place. He took over their basement for a while and hung out with his newly graduated cousin, SuperSwimBoy. SuperSwimBoy will be moving on to swim at Gustavus, a college close to his home town. The boys hung out, went to a Twin's game that lasted 16 innings and generally caroused for "hot chicks."

The girls have a cousin who is 15, she spent time with us doing some shopping, gossiping and driving. Miss 11 has run out of too many things in common with the girls at the moment, as they mostly talk about who's hawt and who's not... but they included her some, and I appreciated that.

My favorite part of the trip was a visit to Trader Joe's. I brought home a few bags of goodies and I am conserving them so I can whip out a treat now and then when I'm feeling sorry for myself and the fact that I live in a town with crap for grocery stores. (why, oh why doesn't Trader Joe's have an online shopping sight??)

I'll be heading out on Thursday for a birthday celebration with SuperSister where Supersister, Miss 16, Miss 11, SuperSisterinLaw and maybe Hubby and Mr 19 will be going to the new Harry Potter flick. I can't wait!

So just in case you wondered if I got kidnapped while I was in the big city, no such luck, I'll be around to bore you again soon!

Love Of My Life

This day I will marry my friend, the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love.

Twenty years have flown by, and I am more in love today than I was then. I can't believe how lucky I am.

La Fête Des Pères

We didn't celebrate in grand style. In fact up until the actual day, I had nothing outside of one meal even planned. First off, I didn't know if Hubby would actually be staying home and not going to work, and secondly, I didn't know who was and who wasn't going to be around. So although we love Hubby to pieces, celebrating wasn't a big priority for us.

Instead, we slept in, well, we tried to sleep in. There was all kinds of noise on the street, and we had been up for 2 hours with a thunderstorm during the night, so although it was eight o'clock, the 1 a.m. bedtime, combined with the 2 hours of being up, and the son who didn't bother coming home at a decent hour, didn't lead to a lot of sleep.

On a side note, my daughters who used to fly to my bedroom at the first rumble of thunder, no longer crawl into my bed and tremble. They each checked on each other, they lay in their own beds for a long time, in each other's beds for a while, and then after 2 hours of waiting for the thunder to FINALLY stop, they got up and checked the radar themselves. Finding it was nearly done, they both went back to bed in their own rooms.

The morning was peaceful outside of a wrestling session with Miss 11. Or it could have been 3 wrestling sessions, it's hard to say if they just blurred into each other or if it was three separate times. We made chocolate chip pancakes and juneberry pancakes for lunch. Rather Miss 11 and Hubby made the pancakes. Yes I know he wasn't supposed to work or cook or do anything on Father's Day. But please remember we didn't celebrate Mother's Day this year either since he was working, so I wasn't about to let him out of everything yesterday. (And if you know him at all, you know he can never sit still for 5 seconds anyway, so he might as well be productive!)

We let Hubby open some small gifts. He and I bought a gorgeous bench for our porch in the early spring months, so we didn't exchange Mother's/Father's day gifts. The girls gave him a few things, and he's still waiting on Mr 19's gift. (He said he was taking care of it... still haven't seen it though.) After gift opening Hubby was begged and cajoled into playing Mario Kart for the Wii with Miss 11. So while they careened over hill and dale I made scotcheroos, Hubby's favorite, and sliced up peaches to have with ice cream for dessert, also Hubby's favorite. I put the chicken into a marinade and Hubby took off on a driver's training drive with Miss 15.

After a delicious supper we loaded the bikes up and headed to a park for a long bike ride. It was gorgeous out, and we enjoyed our time away from the house with Miss 11. Miss 15 had a hot date, so didn't join us.

So Father's Day wasn't an extravagant affair, but it was a chance for us to just be together, and we enjoyed it.

Hop Hop Hop

We had the most wonderful time last week with my Niece (who I still need a nickname for) and SuperSister. Niece is a wild woman. We worked hard to make her more wild then she was before she got here. Our biggest accomplishment was to take one of her newest sayings, "OH NO!" and improve on it with tons of voice inflections and facial actions. It worked and she had us laughing until we cried. Next up is "ALLELUIA!" with a big throw of the arms to top it off.

We had a really fun night when SuperSisterinLaw brought Nephew (who also needs a nickname!) over before supper one night. Miss 11 and I giggled at the two toddlers fighting over every toy in the house, and the ones outside. No, we didn't help to separate or distract them, we just laughed at them. Later BabyBrother came over and we all had a great supper followed by some Godiva Liquor. Yum. Miss 11 was an awesome babysitter for the younger set. I was very proud of her!

Miss 15 (nearly 16) was away for the week, so didn't get to join in on the giggling over the little ones, but she had a good time traveling with her Grandmother to see her cousin's in the big city. She especially enjoyed the shopping.

This week Miss 15's friend is staying with us. The girls are having a great time working out, tanning, rollerblading, and hanging out with their male "friends." Miss 15 is sure to comment after that quote... just wait and see. I spend a lot of time stocking the fridge and cooking. That plus driving them now and again.

Miss 11 has had band, volleyball camp, art class and playdates this week. I also spend time driving her to those activities.

I sort of feel a bit attention deficit myself as I hop, hop, hop from one activity to another with little time to do the things that need to be done. Although it's not as busy as during the school year, and I get moments now and then to visit with the girls, so it makes it all worth it.